MIXTAPE

Cause you had a bad day

Today is bad because of the facial I went for this afternoon. The process was so painful and the aftermath also hurts. Now I feel like crying everytime I look into the mirror. It was so pain that I cried, so ugly that I cried. Even when I wash my face, it hurts.

If it doesn’t get well on monday, I refuse to go to school. I rather burn my money on an MC, since I have already burnt 9 bux on cab fare because I refuse to go home on public transport. I don’t even want to lift up my face, I was looking down all the way home. When I got home I just can’t help but cry. I’ve been crying a lot recently huh.

Anyway I will never ever go for any fucking facials anymore.

Better off alone

I can’t figure out my own feelings. Just like I can’t figure out yours. Maybe everyone just treats me the same. Like a brother, a best friend, and that’s all that I’ll get. Sometimes it’s nice that it’s this way, but sometimes it just makes me feel so, so empty. Like, just what the hell am I? 

Sometimes things occur and I feel like I am being used, being taken for granted. Like people are just using me as a stepping stone to getting somewhere. To getting to know another girl, to getting to know another person for their personal benefits. I really do not know who to trust, and I do not know if anyone is really genuine at all.

I feel like a fool. Really. Especially when I get happy because I thought I had just made a new friend, but the other party actually don’t give a flying fuck about me at all. Because in their minds, it wasn’t even supposed to be me….. but someone around me. It’s not that I want to be in the center of attraction.

I just want to feel appreciated. You know? 

Billie Jean

I’m reviving my tumblr after a long, long hiatus. I think. Okay I’m lazy again. Just gonna reblog.

Sorry but honestly, as much as I want to be there for my friends, I’m getting sick of the relationship problems I have been hearing. So much so I have ran out of things to say to my friends. And I feel really bad and helpless because there is really nothing I can do to help them. Plus it’s always about the same issues. I am, however, no doubt really honoured that my friends are sharing their problems with me because they trust me and value me as a friend. I guess I just want to apologise for being such a useless friend because I can do nothing to help.

And judging from all the problems and a very bad personal experience, a have come up with a relationship cycle.

Strangers > Friends > Flirting period > Dating period > Get together > Honeymoon period > Occasional quarrels > Frequent quarrels > Always quarrel > Always quarrel until problems are literally repeated problems > Break up.

It’s almost always true. 

And most importantly, thank you! Because of you guys I feel so damn glad that I am not in a relationship. And I will never believe in one anymore. Not anytime soon, at least. 

I’m fucking happy being single :)

Your sarcasm totally didn’t help me at all. Thanks so much yeah. Fake.